prayz b 2 mother urth

it has obvi become so hip to be *~*green*~* these days. we are green as grass and will not be outdone by trends.

thus, our 2009 earth day tips on how to stay green in brooklyn:

1. don't bother with paper or plastic, simply slip the desired item into your own purse/american apparel hoodie and quietly exit. (i would make sure there is no metal detector first)
2. poop outside! it makes great fertilizer and saves a flush. (watch out for that poison ivy to wipe)
3. save electricity and only blast the salsa from the radio 3 hours a day - as opposed to your usual 24.
4. cut down on the slave conditions at those rubber plantations, reuse your condom. hey, according to the pope they cause aids anyway.
5. the next war will be fought over water, so take a cue from the local vagabonds and don't shower. you'll save tons of water.
6. hey, while we're at it, hygiene won't save the planet, might as well not flush either.
7. recycle all those pbr cans (or just throw them on the street, because let's face it, inevitably someone will come and recycle it for you).
8. there's no night like garbage night in ny, just make it shopping night!
9. hop on the locavore trend- get out your fishing rod and go fish in the hudson.
10. never underestimate the power of dumpster diving (you win, freegans).

come on people, this is our planet we're talking about. all it takes is a little effort from a lot of people and we can reverse all this global warming, rainforest destruction, icebergs melting extinction of animals, etc. hey, we may even make it to the rapture if we're lucky. cross those green thumbs!